I’m no good.
I don’t know whether I’ve mellowed out or merely been exhausted by chronicling events in Britain’s first online Right-wing culture festival, but when I went to My Doubts and took the Political Spectrum Quiz I was shocked.
I scored okay on Foreign policy – well into neo-con range - and that was fine.
But on social conservatism, I scored pretty damn low.
I was hardly above the cultural liberal/conservative line at all.
What’s the point I wonder in making a personal ideological odyssey from privatize-the-lot natural rights libertarian anarcho-capitalist and trying to justify all kinds of erosions of traditional morality and the British way of life and upturning the constitution and then changing into a to fire-breathing upholder of traditional social structures and (somewhat modified) common decency …if it looks like now I could get along fine with the editor of The Economist or George ‘Two Brains’ Osborne?
This is terrible. I mean, I know it’s supposed to have been weighted according to nationality so that English conservatives would be to the left of American conservatives, and perhaps Scottish conservatives to the left of us, and French conservatives just a frog’s whisker and two showers a year from being indistinguishable from French communists, but this is ridiculous.
There I was happily turning into the kind of lardy middle-aged grouch that I despised in my idealist Objectivist-Rothbardite could-have-been-outthought-by-yeast youth; going with the flow, girding up my loins against hyper individualism and growing a pair of scrutons, getting some Burke in, with smatterings of the Good Doctor and, damn it, it turns out that I’m a wet.
So, even nationally-weighted for
I wonder if that’s because I answered, for example, questions about sexual morality as very important (and they are as any taxpayer who is bringing up children’s kids for someone else will tell you : let alone an inner-city rape victim from two to ninety), but left it as "neutral" in the "how much does this matter" axis – mainly because either I didn’t think that an objective can be achieved at all or that it should be left until the longer term.
So maybe the quiz would have rated me higher on this one if I’d implied I’d agitate for banning or more strictly controlling abortion…when I put a higher priority right now on getting the economy sorted out before we all have to support ourselves by foraging for nuts roots and berries: or reverting to cannibalism.
Granted, the American Right starts from a higher place than we do and they tend to have more can-do that we UK gloomycons have (but remember what happens when it mutates into yes we can), and proper conservatives conserve what they already have available and the Cousins have a lot more liberty, for example, to protect - like these chaps bearing arms in the Presence of The First Emperor whilst protesting against the planned nationalization of the human bodies in the Body Politic.
Cool. At least we’re not quite so pussy-whipped about race as they are. Yet. Nobody even seems to have thought of warning me about the N word here, for example.
Or maybe it’s just a meaningless quiz that gives off inaccurate, quite untrue and downright insulting results like that lousy survey I did from Playboy once.
However, I’m not prepared to risk seeing myself as a slack-jawed limp-dick caponservative so I needto dry myself out a bit and thank goodness, I can always go over here to find something to confirm my every curtain-twitching bourgeois suburban instincts – and I don’t even have to bear arms to do it. Even if I wanted to.
Or I could just go to work.
And in the meantime, some fine art…